Ass Takes: Episode 6 (Special Trade Deadline Edition)
Aug 10, 2022 23:08:22 GMT -6
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Post by New York Knicks on Aug 10, 2022 23:08:22 GMT -6
Fake Woj Account - Welcome to a special trade deadline edition of Ass Takes. The trade deadline means one thing...WOJ BOMBS. I'm your host the REAL Fake Woj Account, and im pumped up to talk trades with these two gentleman. We've got FDA back. And we also have our returning guest Mr Stephen A Beatz. Beatz youre gonna lead it off for us like Rickey Henderson. One of the biggest most recent trades involved the Phoenix Suns and Memphis Grizzlies. The Suns acquired Rafael Aruajo, Gary Harris, and Walter Berry. While the Grizz added Dame Lillard and Al Jefferson in the deal. Who won the trade?
Stephen A Beatz - Love me some Rafael, despite him leaving the Raptors way back when. But, I like the deal for the Grizzlies. Having Lillard playing the SG position I think makes him a much more serviceable player with great defense. Jefferson is year in and year out a top big in this league despite the lack of personal hardware (I am very surprised he has never been an all star). I certainly do not value Berry and Harris as highly as the Suns do. This is a hands down win for the Grizzlies.
FDA - You got your hands down. I got my hands up...as they're palming my face. What the hell are you talking about? Al Jefferson? Al Jefferson is moving on up to his deluxe apartment in the sky...thanks to being one of the leagues most overpaid (And overrated) players. I'll take Rafael over him every single day for the next 5 years. Gary Harris is a good shooter. Great defender. Shares those similarities with Dame...but With half the turnovers. The Suns needed to make a change to their inconsistent roster, and this was the perfect move.
* Editors Note - Walter Berry was not in this deal. It was Calvin Natt that was sent to Phoenix. My apologies.
Fake Woj Account - The Indiana Pacers also just had a notable acquistion in Brad Daugherty. Getting Daugherty was the right move for the Pacers. True or False?
Stephen A Beatz - I used to value Daugherty as a top big in this league but his value had plummeted in my eyes. I was surprised to see the Pacers make a move for him but I understand where they were coming from. Daugherty is on a decent contract and provide great rebounding. I just can't stand seeing a big man turn the ball over as much as he does on such a consistent basis. The Pacers have struggled since the acquisition going 7-6 although taking the toughness of the schedule in to consideration the trade may be worse than it looks.
FDA - They did start off slow trying to fit this massive piece into their puzzle. That was gonna take an adjustment period. But it seems like they've gotten past it winning 3 straight games. Daugherty has some turnover issues. But they're blessed with One of the games least turnover prone point guards in Marcus Smart. So that offsets the TOs. While adding on the huge bonus of Daughertys rebounding. Ultimately it's gonna net the Pacers more possessions. And they'll be better off with this deal.
Fake Woj Account - With just 1 day left before the deadline, which contender should be most active in the next 24 hours?
Stephen A Beatz - I think most of the contenders are pretty set at this point and in positions which are difficult to make deals with the cap situations for most of the teams.
I think the Blazers (currently sitting 3rd in the West) could make some noise. With enticing expiring contracts to move, 1st round picks and cash they have some ability to make some noise.
I think the Pacers are still right there as a contender. I think they should be pushing hard for an upgrade to make a push at a top spot in the East.
FDA - I would like to see the Orlando Magic spice things up a little at point guard. I genuinely believe that's the only thing they're missing in order to return to true contention. They got Dorito Boy having an excellent offensive season. Peja is having a great year coming back from last season's injury. Vince Carter has been a tremendous addition. Only thing that's missing is a dynamic point guard to bring it all together. Maybe that will one day be Tyrese Haliburton...But not today. Today they need something stronger. So put that bud light down Peenman. AND GET SOMETHING STRONGER.
Fake Woj Account - Focusing on the trade market, who's the most coveted player avaliable?
Stephen A Beatz - The Celtics have made it known that Caron Butler is available in Boston. After the disaster of a season this year turned out to be for them I am not all that surprised but to give up on such a talent so early may be a mistake. The package will have to be nice in any return.
FDA - I will never be a fan of this man. But I can no longer deny the 2006 greatness of one Raef Lafrentz. Now we all know he doesn't pass the ball. But maybe that's not a bad thing. Think about it this way. Lafrentz shoots 47% from the field. There's only TWO teams in the league that shoot higher. So why not maximize his field goal attempts when he's shooting better than 93 % of the league? It's brilliant. And it's actually working regardless of the Nets hideous record.
Look at what Raef is doing recently against some of the games top point guards. He played Philly twice. Jason Richardson scored 23 points (9/20) and 12 points (4/13). Raef on the other hand? 48 points and 53 points. Vs Portland he held Spencer Dinwiddie to 10 points (4/12), while scoring 57 points. And best of all, know what he's done vs the Raptors? In 3 games at the point he's averaging 63.3 PPG. 63 used to be the leagues single game scoring record (before Raef crushed it with 81). He's AVERAGING more than that. AVERAGING. Let that sink in.
So it's real simple. If you're a team that needs an extra offensive push to get to that next level...GROW SOME BALLS AND TAKE A CHANCE ON RAEF...Hi Peenman.
Fake Woj Account - On the flip side, who's the fools gold of the market? A player on a losing team with pretty stats, that you would personally stay the fuck away from?
Stephen A Beatz - Raef Lafrentz. He can score... and that's it. It's hard to imagine with a player putting up 40ppg but he is probably a negative player to have. His defense is atrocious and despite playing the PG position, having the ball in his hands he manages to average a full assist lowe than Joel Embiid. I don't even think Raef ever actually looks to pass, the only assists he gets are when he loses the ball and it accidently bounces to a teammate.
FDA - 81 points = fools gold? You're crazy. You wanna know where the real fools gold is buried? Under that ugly leprechaun in the TD Garden. You wanna talk about net negatives? You wanna talk about making your team worse? Cool. Well let's talk about Caron Butler. Let me show you some interesting numbers.
Last two seasons:
The Cleveland Cavaliers are 42-23 (postseason included) WITH Caron Butler.
The Cleveland Cavaliers are 74-17 WITHOUT Caron Butler.
That's a .646 winning percentage against a .813 winning percentage. Meaning the Cavs have been over 160 points WORSE with Caron Butler.
As for his new team the Celtics? Well they were 43-39 Last year. This year they're 29-39. From 4 games over 500 to 10 games UNDER 500. From being in the playoffs to being NINE games OUT of the playoffs.
So who's the real net negative? Caron Butler is real Keyser Soze. Because the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world Caron Butler was any fucking good.
Fake Woj Account - Assuming no more trades are made out West, who's your favorite team at the moment? The Wolves have controlled the conference for most of the season, but the Sonics just overtook them for the #1 seed. And the Kings have won 10 straight as well. So right this second, who's the top dog?
Stephen A Beatz - I like the Wolves. They are a playoff team, although this year they are a different team without Dirk. They surprise us every year, I can see it happening again.
You didn't mention my proxy team, the Trailblazers, but they have been quietly playing great ball out West. I think they could make a push to the WCF this year especially if they are able to add at the trade deadline.
FDA - When will you people finally realize the Wolves aren't that good? Ok they were great early on. They had the best record in the ITP through the first few months of the season. But you know what's happened since? They've gone 22-17 in their last 39 games. They've been playing about 500 basketball for over two months. This is your top dog? This fluffy pomeranian? The Kings would eat their food. The Lakers would spank them. Portland would blaze a trail right up their ass. And the Seattle Supersonics? Shit, that's just animal cruelty.
While the Wolves have gone 22-17...the Seattle Supersonics are 22-3 in their last 25 games. Cole Anthony, Edwards, Jabari are all clicking offensively. Amare and Pavel are dominating on the defensive end. Ken Smith might win 6th man of the year. This team is STACKED. They're the real top dogs.
Fake Woj Account - Let's finish things off with your Toronto Raptors. The Raps have been rolling since Jr Smith was moved to the bench. Will this be the year the Raptors make it to the ECF?
Stephen A Beatz - We miss Prince's defense at the SF position, I think that was a big reason the Raptors were able to push the 76ers to 7 games last year in round 2. The JR move to the bench allows us to put out a more completive defensive starting five while allowing JR to play the supper 6th man role. Overall, I think the Raptors are a better team then they were last year, but the SF position will make or break them.
The Cavs only got better this year, making it even harder to make it to the ECF because round 2 will likely be them or the 76ers. I don't think the Raptors have a strong chance at making the ECF but I can see them competing.
FDA - Forget Tayshaun Prince. You got Dennis Rodman now. And what's gonna happen is the 76ers will dip to the #2 seed. Setting up an East Semis matchup of Raptors vs Sixers. And Dennis Rodman will SHUTDOWN Anthony Davis. He will tear his unibrow right off his face. And Davis will never recover from that. While Gordon and Redd give that overrated Philly backcourt BUCKETS. And Dirk will be the x-factor that pushes you past them once and for all.
Raptors beat the 76ers and play the Cavs in the ECF like it's supposed to be. Lock it in.
Fake Woj Account - What an asinine take. That's what we do here folks. See you in about a month when we'll be a running a special playoff edition of Ass Takes. Our guest will be the fatass Hornet himself Brian Jordhorst.
Stephen A Beatz - Love me some Rafael, despite him leaving the Raptors way back when. But, I like the deal for the Grizzlies. Having Lillard playing the SG position I think makes him a much more serviceable player with great defense. Jefferson is year in and year out a top big in this league despite the lack of personal hardware (I am very surprised he has never been an all star). I certainly do not value Berry and Harris as highly as the Suns do. This is a hands down win for the Grizzlies.
FDA - You got your hands down. I got my hands up...as they're palming my face. What the hell are you talking about? Al Jefferson? Al Jefferson is moving on up to his deluxe apartment in the sky...thanks to being one of the leagues most overpaid (And overrated) players. I'll take Rafael over him every single day for the next 5 years. Gary Harris is a good shooter. Great defender. Shares those similarities with Dame...but With half the turnovers. The Suns needed to make a change to their inconsistent roster, and this was the perfect move.
* Editors Note - Walter Berry was not in this deal. It was Calvin Natt that was sent to Phoenix. My apologies.
Fake Woj Account - The Indiana Pacers also just had a notable acquistion in Brad Daugherty. Getting Daugherty was the right move for the Pacers. True or False?
Stephen A Beatz - I used to value Daugherty as a top big in this league but his value had plummeted in my eyes. I was surprised to see the Pacers make a move for him but I understand where they were coming from. Daugherty is on a decent contract and provide great rebounding. I just can't stand seeing a big man turn the ball over as much as he does on such a consistent basis. The Pacers have struggled since the acquisition going 7-6 although taking the toughness of the schedule in to consideration the trade may be worse than it looks.
FDA - They did start off slow trying to fit this massive piece into their puzzle. That was gonna take an adjustment period. But it seems like they've gotten past it winning 3 straight games. Daugherty has some turnover issues. But they're blessed with One of the games least turnover prone point guards in Marcus Smart. So that offsets the TOs. While adding on the huge bonus of Daughertys rebounding. Ultimately it's gonna net the Pacers more possessions. And they'll be better off with this deal.
Fake Woj Account - With just 1 day left before the deadline, which contender should be most active in the next 24 hours?
Stephen A Beatz - I think most of the contenders are pretty set at this point and in positions which are difficult to make deals with the cap situations for most of the teams.
I think the Blazers (currently sitting 3rd in the West) could make some noise. With enticing expiring contracts to move, 1st round picks and cash they have some ability to make some noise.
I think the Pacers are still right there as a contender. I think they should be pushing hard for an upgrade to make a push at a top spot in the East.
FDA - I would like to see the Orlando Magic spice things up a little at point guard. I genuinely believe that's the only thing they're missing in order to return to true contention. They got Dorito Boy having an excellent offensive season. Peja is having a great year coming back from last season's injury. Vince Carter has been a tremendous addition. Only thing that's missing is a dynamic point guard to bring it all together. Maybe that will one day be Tyrese Haliburton...But not today. Today they need something stronger. So put that bud light down Peenman. AND GET SOMETHING STRONGER.
Fake Woj Account - Focusing on the trade market, who's the most coveted player avaliable?
Stephen A Beatz - The Celtics have made it known that Caron Butler is available in Boston. After the disaster of a season this year turned out to be for them I am not all that surprised but to give up on such a talent so early may be a mistake. The package will have to be nice in any return.
FDA - I will never be a fan of this man. But I can no longer deny the 2006 greatness of one Raef Lafrentz. Now we all know he doesn't pass the ball. But maybe that's not a bad thing. Think about it this way. Lafrentz shoots 47% from the field. There's only TWO teams in the league that shoot higher. So why not maximize his field goal attempts when he's shooting better than 93 % of the league? It's brilliant. And it's actually working regardless of the Nets hideous record.
Look at what Raef is doing recently against some of the games top point guards. He played Philly twice. Jason Richardson scored 23 points (9/20) and 12 points (4/13). Raef on the other hand? 48 points and 53 points. Vs Portland he held Spencer Dinwiddie to 10 points (4/12), while scoring 57 points. And best of all, know what he's done vs the Raptors? In 3 games at the point he's averaging 63.3 PPG. 63 used to be the leagues single game scoring record (before Raef crushed it with 81). He's AVERAGING more than that. AVERAGING. Let that sink in.
So it's real simple. If you're a team that needs an extra offensive push to get to that next level...GROW SOME BALLS AND TAKE A CHANCE ON RAEF...Hi Peenman.
Fake Woj Account - On the flip side, who's the fools gold of the market? A player on a losing team with pretty stats, that you would personally stay the fuck away from?
Stephen A Beatz - Raef Lafrentz. He can score... and that's it. It's hard to imagine with a player putting up 40ppg but he is probably a negative player to have. His defense is atrocious and despite playing the PG position, having the ball in his hands he manages to average a full assist lowe than Joel Embiid. I don't even think Raef ever actually looks to pass, the only assists he gets are when he loses the ball and it accidently bounces to a teammate.
FDA - 81 points = fools gold? You're crazy. You wanna know where the real fools gold is buried? Under that ugly leprechaun in the TD Garden. You wanna talk about net negatives? You wanna talk about making your team worse? Cool. Well let's talk about Caron Butler. Let me show you some interesting numbers.
Last two seasons:
The Cleveland Cavaliers are 42-23 (postseason included) WITH Caron Butler.
The Cleveland Cavaliers are 74-17 WITHOUT Caron Butler.
That's a .646 winning percentage against a .813 winning percentage. Meaning the Cavs have been over 160 points WORSE with Caron Butler.
As for his new team the Celtics? Well they were 43-39 Last year. This year they're 29-39. From 4 games over 500 to 10 games UNDER 500. From being in the playoffs to being NINE games OUT of the playoffs.
So who's the real net negative? Caron Butler is real Keyser Soze. Because the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world Caron Butler was any fucking good.
Fake Woj Account - Assuming no more trades are made out West, who's your favorite team at the moment? The Wolves have controlled the conference for most of the season, but the Sonics just overtook them for the #1 seed. And the Kings have won 10 straight as well. So right this second, who's the top dog?
Stephen A Beatz - I like the Wolves. They are a playoff team, although this year they are a different team without Dirk. They surprise us every year, I can see it happening again.
You didn't mention my proxy team, the Trailblazers, but they have been quietly playing great ball out West. I think they could make a push to the WCF this year especially if they are able to add at the trade deadline.
FDA - When will you people finally realize the Wolves aren't that good? Ok they were great early on. They had the best record in the ITP through the first few months of the season. But you know what's happened since? They've gone 22-17 in their last 39 games. They've been playing about 500 basketball for over two months. This is your top dog? This fluffy pomeranian? The Kings would eat their food. The Lakers would spank them. Portland would blaze a trail right up their ass. And the Seattle Supersonics? Shit, that's just animal cruelty.
While the Wolves have gone 22-17...the Seattle Supersonics are 22-3 in their last 25 games. Cole Anthony, Edwards, Jabari are all clicking offensively. Amare and Pavel are dominating on the defensive end. Ken Smith might win 6th man of the year. This team is STACKED. They're the real top dogs.
Fake Woj Account - Let's finish things off with your Toronto Raptors. The Raps have been rolling since Jr Smith was moved to the bench. Will this be the year the Raptors make it to the ECF?
Stephen A Beatz - We miss Prince's defense at the SF position, I think that was a big reason the Raptors were able to push the 76ers to 7 games last year in round 2. The JR move to the bench allows us to put out a more completive defensive starting five while allowing JR to play the supper 6th man role. Overall, I think the Raptors are a better team then they were last year, but the SF position will make or break them.
The Cavs only got better this year, making it even harder to make it to the ECF because round 2 will likely be them or the 76ers. I don't think the Raptors have a strong chance at making the ECF but I can see them competing.
FDA - Forget Tayshaun Prince. You got Dennis Rodman now. And what's gonna happen is the 76ers will dip to the #2 seed. Setting up an East Semis matchup of Raptors vs Sixers. And Dennis Rodman will SHUTDOWN Anthony Davis. He will tear his unibrow right off his face. And Davis will never recover from that. While Gordon and Redd give that overrated Philly backcourt BUCKETS. And Dirk will be the x-factor that pushes you past them once and for all.
Raptors beat the 76ers and play the Cavs in the ECF like it's supposed to be. Lock it in.
Fake Woj Account - What an asinine take. That's what we do here folks. See you in about a month when we'll be a running a special playoff edition of Ass Takes. Our guest will be the fatass Hornet himself Brian Jordhorst.
