Ass Takes: Episode 2 (Featuring Stephen A Beatz)
Jul 4, 2022 14:14:05 GMT -6
klomper24, beatonz, and 2 more like this
Post by New York Knicks on Jul 4, 2022 14:14:05 GMT -6
* Disclaimer - This is a collaborative effort with Beatonz (Stephen A Beatz)
Annoying Molly - Welcome back to another episode of Ass Takes, short for Asinine Takes. I’m your dim witted host Annoying Molly. FDA is back. But this time we’re joined by a new guest Mr Stephen A Beatz. Stephen let’s start with you, Who got the better backcourt, Raptors (Gordon/Redd) or Bulls (Beal/Harper)?
Stephen A Beatz - I may be biased but Gordon and Redd are the duo I would be without much thought. Beal and Harper clearly edge Gordon and Redd in the defense department but you have to love a backcourt with two guards with 100 3 point shooting.
I like Beal and Harper a lot, I was actually trying to acquire Harper a while back when he was on the block but we couldn't get a deal done.
FDA - You’re damn right you’re bias. All that three point shooting don’t mean much when you got Ron Harper all in your face. Mr four time all defensive First team. With Bradley Beal, who’s been all defense second team the last two seasons. Beal is averaging 1.1 Blocks per game...as a POINT GUARD! He’s gonna be sending those three point shots right back into little Benny’s face. While Harpers off-ball defense makes Michaels face turn Redd out of frustration. The best defensive backcourt in the league + they score about 53 PPG combined. Let’s give those Chicago Boys their respect.
Annoying Molly - This is another question you might have some expertise on. Best bargain contract (non-rookie deal) in the ITP: Jr Smith or John Williams?
Stephen A Beatz - John Williams, he is incredible and slid under a lot of peoples radars. When I took over the Blazers I made him the centerpiece of the team and focused on his development. With strong defense and rebounding and continued growth on the offensive end, I would put him in the top 5, possibly top 3 SF in the league while making less than $10M for the next three years.
JR was a steal, but the Raptors got lucky with him after signing his contract. It's a great contract but doesn't compare to Williams. After years of mediocre training camps he grew into his own last season. As a #1 option he could be a top 10 scorer. Playing behind Gordon (30ppg) and Redd (28ppg) doesn't help his numbers. Great contract and I honestly regret not signing a 7 year deal with him. I am surprised no one offered a better contract to a young player with years left of camps.
FDA - And that’s why I always tell these athletes to stay off the weed. Because you clearly had Jr Smith under the influence when he signed that contract. 5 million dollars a year for a 23 year old averaging 23 PPG? While KWAME BROWN is making over 16 million. John Williams is signed to a heck of a deal. But JRs is cheaper and longer. I’m going with Swish.
Annoying Molly - Speaking of bargain, who’s gonna bargain their way into the playoffs? Who's your pick for the 8 seed in the East? Boston or Milwaukee?
Stephen A Beatz - I like the Bucks, I think they have a very solid team actually. I think they are well rounded and could potentially take some games from the #1 seed.
I think Boston just has too many holes in their line up.
FDA - You wanna talk about holes? How about all the holes in the Bucks Swiss Cheese Defense? They’re giving up the most points in the league at 113 per game. Celtics on the other hand are top 10 in the league in points allowed and opponent field goal percentage. They play better defense, and they got the best player amongst the two teams in Joel Embiid. And they got some backcourt firepower with Devin Harris and Jamal Crawford. Bucks are nice little flashy offensive group. But the Celtics are a better team.
Annoying Molly - Lets switch gears from the playoffs to the lottery. The Seattle Supersonics own the Utah Jazz 1st Round Pick (22-45 record). The Orlando Magic own this year's Mavericks pick (21-42 record). Who would you LEAST like to see win the lottery?
Stephen A Beatz - Would be scary to see either team win. Both have good foundations for teams. Both should be playoff teams but Pejas injury set Orlando back.
As much as I wouldn't want to see a top pick come into the East (it is already too stacked), if the Sonics get a #1 to add to Magic, Jrue , Ant and lots of cap room... watch out. For that reason, I would like to see the Magic get it.
FDA - That is a good point about the Sonics, and normally I would agree with you. But except when it comes to the Magic and their front office. Specially Peenman. You’re talking about somebody that goes around saying “Fuck Saddiq Bey”. Saddiq Bey, a poor guy trying to make a living playing in the D League. That’s like kicking a dog. Or not returning your shopping cart at Walmart. That’s low. And for that reason alone I do not want to see the Magic enjoy any lottery luck.
Annoying Molly - Staying on the topic of luck, will Philly get lucky again this season? The Philadelphia 76ers will repeat as ITP Champions. True or False?
Stephen A Beatz - False - I like the odds of one of the other top 4 East teams taking them down before the finals even.
The Raptors have faced them three times this season and have had great matches every game (all within 3 points). They aren't unbeatable and I think they will see that early in the playoffs this year.
76ERS 139, Raptors 137
RAPTORS 109, 76ers 107
76ers 103, RAPTORS 100
FDA - Those were some close games. But guess what? You lost 2-1. And that’s what the 76ers do. They beat you, they beat me, they beat everybody. And until somebody stops them, they’re my pick to win the championship again. They got the best record in the league, the best point differential, the best big 3, the best everything.
Annoying Molly - Lets talk about another division leading team, The Minnesota Timberwolves. Would the Midwest 1st place Twolves even make the playoffs if they were in a a REAL division (our division)?
Stephen A Beatz - Tough call, I don't think they would make it in though. I compare them to teams like Boston and Milwaukee, fringe teams but someone can't make it.
When I look at the East, I see the Pistons and Hawks having better teams and then the Wolves, Bucks and Celtics would be battling it out. It would be a toss up.
FDA - Earlier in the year I would’ve said hell no. Them running around with Vinnie Johnson as their starting point guard was disgraceful. But fortunately they got themselves a competent PG now in Killian Hayes. Dirk Nowitzki and Wagner are a nice 1-2 punch. I think they’ve got just enough to get that 8 seed.
Annoying Molly - Sticking with the Midwest, Which Yourkers-led rebuilding project will return to the playoffs first? His actual team (Spurs) or proxy team (Memphis)?
Stephen A Beatz - Gotta be the Spurs. They will have a top pick and a better cap situation. The Grizzlies are in cap hell with some terrible contracts which wont be easy to recover from (I mean that J Williams contract is rough). If the Spurs can land a top FA, then they could be back as early as next season... I mean, a 24-43 team currently holds the 8th seed...
FDA - If the Spurs can land a top free agent? What top free agent is going to San Antonio? We both know about the big ole women in San Antonio. Young rich male millionaires don’t wanna go there. Even Richard Jefferson told them to go screw themselves. It’s clearly the Grizz. They at least have a foundation. They’re top 5 in the league in scoring defense. All they need is a little more firepower on the other side of the ball. If they can draft themselves a legit scorer, the Grizz will be better than San Antonio. And possibly get into the playoffs by next year.
Annoying Molly - And that will do it for today. Tune in next time. Hopefully the network doesn’t cancel us while we look for new guests.
Annoying Molly - Welcome back to another episode of Ass Takes, short for Asinine Takes. I’m your dim witted host Annoying Molly. FDA is back. But this time we’re joined by a new guest Mr Stephen A Beatz. Stephen let’s start with you, Who got the better backcourt, Raptors (Gordon/Redd) or Bulls (Beal/Harper)?
Stephen A Beatz - I may be biased but Gordon and Redd are the duo I would be without much thought. Beal and Harper clearly edge Gordon and Redd in the defense department but you have to love a backcourt with two guards with 100 3 point shooting.
I like Beal and Harper a lot, I was actually trying to acquire Harper a while back when he was on the block but we couldn't get a deal done.
FDA - You’re damn right you’re bias. All that three point shooting don’t mean much when you got Ron Harper all in your face. Mr four time all defensive First team. With Bradley Beal, who’s been all defense second team the last two seasons. Beal is averaging 1.1 Blocks per game...as a POINT GUARD! He’s gonna be sending those three point shots right back into little Benny’s face. While Harpers off-ball defense makes Michaels face turn Redd out of frustration. The best defensive backcourt in the league + they score about 53 PPG combined. Let’s give those Chicago Boys their respect.
Annoying Molly - This is another question you might have some expertise on. Best bargain contract (non-rookie deal) in the ITP: Jr Smith or John Williams?
Stephen A Beatz - John Williams, he is incredible and slid under a lot of peoples radars. When I took over the Blazers I made him the centerpiece of the team and focused on his development. With strong defense and rebounding and continued growth on the offensive end, I would put him in the top 5, possibly top 3 SF in the league while making less than $10M for the next three years.
JR was a steal, but the Raptors got lucky with him after signing his contract. It's a great contract but doesn't compare to Williams. After years of mediocre training camps he grew into his own last season. As a #1 option he could be a top 10 scorer. Playing behind Gordon (30ppg) and Redd (28ppg) doesn't help his numbers. Great contract and I honestly regret not signing a 7 year deal with him. I am surprised no one offered a better contract to a young player with years left of camps.
FDA - And that’s why I always tell these athletes to stay off the weed. Because you clearly had Jr Smith under the influence when he signed that contract. 5 million dollars a year for a 23 year old averaging 23 PPG? While KWAME BROWN is making over 16 million. John Williams is signed to a heck of a deal. But JRs is cheaper and longer. I’m going with Swish.
Annoying Molly - Speaking of bargain, who’s gonna bargain their way into the playoffs? Who's your pick for the 8 seed in the East? Boston or Milwaukee?
Stephen A Beatz - I like the Bucks, I think they have a very solid team actually. I think they are well rounded and could potentially take some games from the #1 seed.
I think Boston just has too many holes in their line up.
FDA - You wanna talk about holes? How about all the holes in the Bucks Swiss Cheese Defense? They’re giving up the most points in the league at 113 per game. Celtics on the other hand are top 10 in the league in points allowed and opponent field goal percentage. They play better defense, and they got the best player amongst the two teams in Joel Embiid. And they got some backcourt firepower with Devin Harris and Jamal Crawford. Bucks are nice little flashy offensive group. But the Celtics are a better team.
Annoying Molly - Lets switch gears from the playoffs to the lottery. The Seattle Supersonics own the Utah Jazz 1st Round Pick (22-45 record). The Orlando Magic own this year's Mavericks pick (21-42 record). Who would you LEAST like to see win the lottery?
Stephen A Beatz - Would be scary to see either team win. Both have good foundations for teams. Both should be playoff teams but Pejas injury set Orlando back.
As much as I wouldn't want to see a top pick come into the East (it is already too stacked), if the Sonics get a #1 to add to Magic, Jrue , Ant and lots of cap room... watch out. For that reason, I would like to see the Magic get it.
FDA - That is a good point about the Sonics, and normally I would agree with you. But except when it comes to the Magic and their front office. Specially Peenman. You’re talking about somebody that goes around saying “Fuck Saddiq Bey”. Saddiq Bey, a poor guy trying to make a living playing in the D League. That’s like kicking a dog. Or not returning your shopping cart at Walmart. That’s low. And for that reason alone I do not want to see the Magic enjoy any lottery luck.
Annoying Molly - Staying on the topic of luck, will Philly get lucky again this season? The Philadelphia 76ers will repeat as ITP Champions. True or False?
Stephen A Beatz - False - I like the odds of one of the other top 4 East teams taking them down before the finals even.
The Raptors have faced them three times this season and have had great matches every game (all within 3 points). They aren't unbeatable and I think they will see that early in the playoffs this year.
76ERS 139, Raptors 137
RAPTORS 109, 76ers 107
76ers 103, RAPTORS 100
FDA - Those were some close games. But guess what? You lost 2-1. And that’s what the 76ers do. They beat you, they beat me, they beat everybody. And until somebody stops them, they’re my pick to win the championship again. They got the best record in the league, the best point differential, the best big 3, the best everything.
Annoying Molly - Lets talk about another division leading team, The Minnesota Timberwolves. Would the Midwest 1st place Twolves even make the playoffs if they were in a a REAL division (our division)?
Stephen A Beatz - Tough call, I don't think they would make it in though. I compare them to teams like Boston and Milwaukee, fringe teams but someone can't make it.
When I look at the East, I see the Pistons and Hawks having better teams and then the Wolves, Bucks and Celtics would be battling it out. It would be a toss up.
FDA - Earlier in the year I would’ve said hell no. Them running around with Vinnie Johnson as their starting point guard was disgraceful. But fortunately they got themselves a competent PG now in Killian Hayes. Dirk Nowitzki and Wagner are a nice 1-2 punch. I think they’ve got just enough to get that 8 seed.
Annoying Molly - Sticking with the Midwest, Which Yourkers-led rebuilding project will return to the playoffs first? His actual team (Spurs) or proxy team (Memphis)?
Stephen A Beatz - Gotta be the Spurs. They will have a top pick and a better cap situation. The Grizzlies are in cap hell with some terrible contracts which wont be easy to recover from (I mean that J Williams contract is rough). If the Spurs can land a top FA, then they could be back as early as next season... I mean, a 24-43 team currently holds the 8th seed...
FDA - If the Spurs can land a top free agent? What top free agent is going to San Antonio? We both know about the big ole women in San Antonio. Young rich male millionaires don’t wanna go there. Even Richard Jefferson told them to go screw themselves. It’s clearly the Grizz. They at least have a foundation. They’re top 5 in the league in scoring defense. All they need is a little more firepower on the other side of the ball. If they can draft themselves a legit scorer, the Grizz will be better than San Antonio. And possibly get into the playoffs by next year.
Annoying Molly - And that will do it for today. Tune in next time. Hopefully the network doesn’t cancel us while we look for new guests.
